Inmate Zero (2017): A Somersetian Retrospective
By Esme Hayes
Inmate Zero (2017), originally titled Patients of a Saint, is a zombie film set in a prison. This prison is supposedly located on an Irish island; however, ignoring the use of CGI to erase Whitstone School, The Church of St Peter and St Paul and several residential buildings from the prison’s surroundings, you’ll quickly recognise the prison as Shepton Mallet’s own. Shepton Mallet Prison has been used as a filming location for several productions, most notably featuring in Paddington 2 (2017). Inmate Zero is anything but notable, but it is at least mentionable for the extensive screen time Shepton Mallet Prison gets in it. I understand that the film makers wanted to take as much advantage of the location as possible, but interjecting the film’s action with random, arbitrary shots hovering on the prison’s chimney and various CCTV cameras pointlessly and gratuitously lengthens the runtime. It’s astounding that, in a horror film, almost an equivalent amount of time is spent on exterior shots of the prison than on any true gore. The lack of gore is the most significant and surprising disappointment of Inmate Zero. You would expect a cheap, straight-to-streaming, 18-rated horror film to contain some proper blood and gristle, but for some unfathomable reason every time someone gets beheaded or bludgeoned the film cuts away to reaction shots. The most gore the audience is treated to is repeated shots of zombies smearing red syrup on windows, like rogue toddlers at an art class. The film is also packed with bemusing and occasionally repugnant offensive humour, as outdated now as it was when it was released in 2019.
You should watch this film for the satisfaction of completing the Somerset film canon, perhaps giving your Somerset film watching exodus a special flavour during Halloween. But most importantly, you should watch it because I’m in it.
Yes, I had a brief stint behind bars at Shepton Mallet Prison, as faithfully recorded in Inmate Zero. Have fun guessing which grimy extra I am!
Somerset o’meter score: 2/5
Breaking down Inmate Zero’s score:
Lots of footage of a Somerset location, to the point it is of archival significance.
Isn’t set in Somerset and makes no commentary about Somersetness.
Trailer:
Where to watch Inmate Zero:
Also available on DVD.